W hen I was little, my mom and dad used to give me and my sister Beth a metaphor for prioritizing our lives. It would often pop up around the beginning of the school year, or on New Year’Äôs Eve or before a big move’Äîreally any time we wanted to decide how we would be spending our lives. They told us to think about our lives as jar that we could fill up how ever we wanted. The catch was that everything that we might put into this jar would have to be classifies as either a large rock, or a small pebble depending on how important it was to us. The rocks represented our biggest priorities’Äîmine were probably karate and soccer’Äîbut they were supposed to be the things we would spend most of our time with. We also had to decide what our little pebbles were. Now, this metaphor worked because, as Beth and I soon figured out, if we wanted both our rocks and pebbles to fit, the jar could only be filled in one way. If you put the little pebbles in first, the rocks wouldn’Äôt fit, because the bottom would be so tightly packed with pebbles that there would be no room left for the rocks, but if you put the big rocks in first, then the smaller pebbles would fill in the spaces they left. In this way, we were encouraged to prioritize, putting the most important things first, and letting the little things fall where they may.
For some reason, this little exercise has stuck with me and as I’Äôve grown as a Christian, I’Äôve often asked myself what my biggest rock should be. Of course, the obvious answer should be God, but what does that mean for how I live my life? Luke is attempting to respond to a similar question when he tells the story of Mary and Martha. Contextually, Luke places the story of Mary and Martha on the heels of the parable of the Good Samaritan. We all know the story of that unlikely character who is so moved by his pity that he simply has to act, but the reason why Jesus tells this story in the first place is often brushed aside.
Jesus tells the parable of the Good Samaritan in response to a lawyer’Äôs question. The lawyer first asks Jesus, ’ÄúTeacher, what must I do to inherit eternal life?’Äù To which Jesus responds with another question, ’ÄúWhat is written in the law? What did you read there?’Äù The lawyer gets it right saying, ’ÄúYou shall love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your strength, and with all your mind; and your neighbor as yourself.’Äù But, the lawyer remains a little shaky about one of the 2 parts of the law. One of the terms doesn’Äôt seem to be defined quite well enough for him. ’ÄúOkay Jesus, love my neighbor, but who is that?’Äù To that question, Jesus responds with the parable of the Good Samaritan. The parable is a demonstration of how to love one’Äôs neighbor, but that leaves the other half of the greatest commandment unaddressed. Luke is given the task of illustrating how to ’ÄúLove the Lord your God.’Äù To do this, Luke uses the story of Mary and Martha.
Unavoidably, I suppose, Luke presents Mary and Martha in an adversarial relationship: Mary sitting and listening to Jesus with Martha upset that she is left with all of the work. Maybe it’Äôs because I’Äôm the oldest of the four children in my family, or maybe because I’Äôm a ’ÄúJ’Äù on the Myers Briggs test, but it’Äôs always seemed to me that Martha gets a raw deal in this story. After all, she comes away with a reputation for being a workaholic who gets upset when others don’Äôt share in her burdens. Sure, anyone who has worked in a group with a few slackers can identify with her exasperation, but the story is cheapened a little bit if Martha is left in such a polarized, negative role. Martha’Äôs actions, while definitely distracted by an overwhelming amount of work to do, are not indicative of a lack of desire to focus on what is most important. In fact, I’Äôd say that the she gets so distracted because she’Äôs trying so hard to get it right. Here she is, with Jesus coming into her home and she’Äôs running around to make sure everything is right for him and the other guests. Martha isn’Äôt ignoring Jesus on purpose, but rather she is making a concerted effort to do what she thinks Jesus would want. It’Äôs here where I think most of us, or at least I can identify most with Martha. We want so badly to live good, purposeful lives that we allow our to-do lists to become the size of small novels and we lose sight of why we undertake the tasks in the first place. It’Äôs not that the things we do are bad, or don’Äôt need to be done, but like Martha has done, it’Äôs so easy to sacrifice the great on the altar of the good. Martha is so confident that she is doing what Jesus wants that she even appeals to him for some backup.
Yet, Jesus’Äô response isn’Äôt the support she expects to receive. ’ÄúMartha, you are worried and distracted by many things.’Äù If that were me, I could see the rebuttal forming in my head, ’Äúyeah, maybe I’Äôd be a little less distracted if my sister would get up and help.’Äù But then Jesus adds, ’Äúthere is need of only one thing.’Äù That statement places all of Martha’Äôs responsibilities beneath choice that her sister has made. All of a sudden, Martha is forced to realize that she has unwittingly filled her jar so full with pebbles that she totally forgot about the biggest rock of all. Martha is so worried about how she will be perceived by her guests that she neglects the most important one.
And then there’Äôs Mary. Jesus tells us that Mary chose ’Äúthe better part.’Äù According to Luke, Mary only does two things: she sits at the Lord’Äôs feet and she listens. Mary’Äôs simple actions are an important part of discipleship. She puts Jesus first, placing everything else on hold for just a little while. In this time that she has set aside, Mary does what she can to get close to Jesus and once she is there, she doesn’Äôt presume anything; she just sits at his feet and receives what he has to say. Mary doesn’Äôt need to guess what Jesus wants or what he needs because she is clearly in a position where he could ask anything he wished of her. Jesus came to Mary and Martha; all they needed to do was make time to listen to him.
Coming into this summer internship, my hope was to figure out what God wanted from me in my life. Would God want me to be an ordained minister? Was I feeling called to non-profit work? Would I come to any conclusions at all? Would I be okay with not knowing? I came here full of questions and excitement about the answers I might find. I was going to take every opportunity presented to me and experience all that I could whenever I could do it. After about 2 weeks though, I began to feel a little overwhelmed. I was getting a little behind on the response papers for the Lilly Programs back in Davidson, and I found myself straining last-minute to consider Ashley’Äôs reflection questions before our weekly meetings. The papers weren’Äôt behind for lack of experiences to write about and the questions certainly weren’Äôt difficult due to a lack of things to discuss. No, I was so caught up in trying to do everything that I hadn’Äôt taken any time to figure out what God was trying to tell me through it all. After a few recommendations from Ashley and Tim, the program director at Davidson, I began to set aside time on Thursday mornings to reflect and listen for God. Those Thursday mornings have become some of the most treasured times of my summer. My writing became clearer and the questions I was given seemed to become more meaningful. Coming out of those mornings, I have often found myself re-invigorated, re-energized and much more in tune with what I’Äôm doing.
As many of you probably know, one of Ashley’Äôs favorite questions to ask is, ’ÄúWhat did that make you realize?’Äù She will ask this question any time about anything, so I’Äôve learned to be on my toes around her. For the first two weeks I was here, I dreaded that question. Realize? I haven’Äôt had time to breathe, let alone realize anything! But my opinion has changed and I’Äôve decided that she’Äôs right; it is a great question. It’Äôs a question that can’Äôt be answered without taking time to reflect on what you are doing. It’Äôs a question that forces me to think about the whys behind the actions, emotions, and experiences. As the summer has moved along, this question has evolved from a point of frustration to a question that I find popping into my head all on its own. In order for the question to be used to its full potential though, it requires enough time to pray about it, and see where God wants to put us in the equation. Used prayerfully, the question becomes stronger: What does this make you realize about who God has made you? What does this make you realize about how God is using you? What does this make you realize about where God is calling you? Those are the most powerful questions, but they’Äôre also the ones that we can’Äôt answer on our own.
Because of our faith, we are called to action and to love our neighbor, but it is through our time spent listening to God that we can begin to understand the unique ways in which we are called to live. Mary’Äôs act of discipleship is simple enough. She makes time, sits at Jesus’Äô feet, and listens for what he has to say. For Mary, time with God comes first and the pebbles aren’Äôt of any real concern. That is how Luke calls us to love God: Intentionally making time to listen for God’Äôs voice. This is so important because without being intentional, our own voice and the deafening noises of the world around us will drown God out. Certainly, we are not called simply to a life of reflection; that would not allow us to respond to God’Äôs voice. But similarly, acting without first listening for God, we would be left spinning our tires, not really getting anywhere with our actions. Maybe Fred Craddock put it best when he said, ’ÄúIf we were to ask Jesus which example applies to us, the Samaritan or Mary, his answer would probably be Yes.’Äù
We live in a broken world that will always need more than we are able to provide by ourselves, but God knows what we can provide and where we are needed most. Reflecting about how we as Christians are called to act in the world, Elton Trueblood writes, ’Äúwe cannot reasonably expect to erect a constantly expanding structure of social activism upon a constantly diminishing foundation of faith, attention to the cultivation of the inner life is our first order of business, even in a period of rapid social change. The Church, if it is to affect the world, must become a center from which new spiritual power emanates.’Äù Yes, acting out God’Äôs will is important, but equally as important is the act of genuine listening to discern God’Äôs will.
The Gospel according to Luke suggests that God doesn’Äôt demand much for us to love God, but God does demand that we make time to listen to what God has to say. The way I’Äôve always read this story, Mary has the easy job, doesn’Äôt she? For some reason, time spent listening to God isn’Äôt just another chore; it’Äôs the relief. God knows us better than we could possibly understand and, although we don’Äôt, God knows why we’Äôre here. I’Äôve been doing a lot of thinking lately about what my biggest rock should be. But I think what’Äôs more important is what God thinks our big rocks should be; and to figure out what God thinks, we need to make time to listen.

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